Holy pregnancy hormones! They have come with a vengeance and don’t seem to be letting up anytime soon. I’m almost 35 weeks so the light at the end of the tunnel is getting brighter… thank you Lord! But the past couple of weeks have been emotional, to say the least. The Sarge is working mid-shift so he leaves for work around 10pm each night. And it makes me want to cry every time I see him put on his uniform and hug me before heading out the door. So pathetic! As soon as he leaves, I go to sleep so it’s not like I really “miss” him in my dreams. And by the time I wake up in the morning, he’s coming home. But for whatever reason, the sight of him leaving does me in almost every day. My usual response to him leaving is a whiny “I don’t want you to go! Call in sick!” I’m pretty sure if the roles were reversed and I were the husband, I’d want to strangle me for being so needy. Luckily, he just smiles at me and slowly backs away from the tears.
The other thing I didn’t expect was the fatigue. Everyone kept shaking their heads and “blessing my little heart” when they heard I’d be pregnant in the summertime. I survived 4 summers in Arizona and one in North Carolina pretty well so I figured they were just weaklings. Welllll…. the joke’s on my chubby buns. Walking to the car from the house or the store requires a 5-minute session to get my breath back to normal. I have to make a concentrated effort to breathe deep and not hyperventilate after taking 10 steps. It has to be the humidity combined with a fetus squishing my lungs out of the way. I refuse to believe I’m that out of shape. Bending over is also proving to be a tricky task. This is especially apparent in the shower when trying to shave. We’ve watched a few birth videos in our childbirth class and let’s just say, razors apparently don’t exist for the women giving birth. I’m sorry, but if I can’t tell where the baby’s hair is from the naughty bits, there’s a problem. However, shaving around a giant orb that blocks your view of the aforementioned parts is awfully scary. Razor burn is one thing but knicking the hoo-hoo? Ouch. My solution was to get a mirror in the shower and let me tell you, it is not glamorous. However, I feel confident that when I go into labor, no one will be humming “Welcome to the Jungle” and that brings me some consolation.
All that aside, I can’t complain too much. I’m just not used to feeling less than 100% (I am horrible at being sick and have giant pity parties). So I am incredibly grateful not to be experiencing the million other pregnancy issues that most women deal with. I’m keeping my fingers crossed that all these claims will stay true but so far, I’ve avoided the following: varicose veins (they run in the family), hemorrhoids, stretch marks, peeing my pants (this is a major miracle in itself), heartburn, morning sickness, dizziness, bleeding gums, massive weight gain (16 pounds gained so far), cankles, any type of swelling, and painful aches & pains. I plan to stay optimistic as long as the hormones don’t get the best of me. But suffice it to say, I am still ready to be done with the pregnancy part; this just isn’t my type of picnic!